Year Seven: "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part One" (2010), Running Time: 2:26
7:44pm: OK people, we're on the edge of glory now! Yates is back. I never left. Dumbledore's gone. Let's get some Horcruxes!
7:46pm: Hey it's Bill Nighy as the new Minister of Magic. I barely recognized him without that squid on his face.
7:48pm: First and only shot of Hermione's Muggle parents as she modifies herself out of their memory.
7:52pm: Voldemort convenes a meeting of his evil board of directors (aka the Tea Party). Which raises the question: Where was the Dark Lord for all of movie number six? No Ralph is a travesty.
7:55pm: Dumbledore is still dead. The movie reminds me, so I remind you. See how silly that is?
8:00pm: Everyone polyjuices themself into Harry. Great gimmick. Like he's a foreign dictator. Or even a domestic one. This leads to the one and only car chase in the series (flying car doesn't count, not a chase). The important thing is that Voldemort's here. Also Mad-Eye doesn't make it and George is seriously injured.
8:13pm: Ginny asks Harry to zip up the back of her dress before the wedding. Awfully forward of you, young lady.
8:20pm: OK! Dinner break, over. Fleur and Bill's wedding, over. Minister of Magic, dead. It's fightin time!
8:24pm: Indeed, a really excellent shootout erupts in the coffee shop where the kids are hiding out.
8:26pm: Ron calls Harry "the boss" which is interesting, given their friendship dynamic.
8:32pm: What I think is fab about "Deathly Hallows, Part 1" is the slow, plodding way the story plays out. It's the least rushed and most intentional of all the movies. But now, in my 15th hour, it's starting to feel like it drags. Maybe I'll do some Yoga here in the house.
8:34pm: Oh Delores Umbridge is alive! The Centaurs apparently were .... done .... with her. Gross.
8:40pm: As referenced many hours ago, my version of Yoga is more of a clumsy stretch. Still, it does the trick.
8:48pm: I guess the whole investigation/inquisition/fear/suspicion theme here is meant to remind us of the 1950's and McCarthy-era Communism hunts in America. Who's "loyal" and who's not. But it's always felt a little squishier than that to me. Can't put my finger on why, exactly.
8:55pm: Now comes my favorite bit of the movie. The kids have the Horcrux locket, are on the run in the wilderness from the authorities, and have no logical next step since they can't hurt or destroy the locket. Plus it makes whichever of them wears it hateful and angry. Love how drawn out and painful it is for them. The movie poster is them on the run for a reason. Yates scores here.
9:04pm: More tension around control of the group, not to mention the non-existent love triangle. Ron, don't leave. Don't be daft.
9:07pm: Harry & Hermione break a moment of tension by clumsily dancing to a song on the radio. Harry, you are a lucky wizard.
9:09pm: Harry discovers the inscription on the golden snitch. "I open at the close." One of Rowling's loveliest lines of riddle-poetry.
9:12pm: We return to Godric's Hollow (unlike many locations in the story, not a real place), the site of Lily & James' murder. Harry there meets an old, mute woman who they believe to be Bathilda Bagshot. But suddenly, in one of the biggest shocks of the movie, she turns out to actually be giant snake Nagini. The old "hide in a dead lady's skin" trick. Disgusting and awesome.
9:24pm: A Patronus leads Harry to a frozen lake where the sword of Godric Gryffindor is lying in wait. The locket around his neck tries to drown him in the process. Gotta watch out for those evil enchanted lockets. Ron re-appears just in time to pull him out of the icy lake.
9:27pm: Harry speaks Parseltongue to the locket in order for it to open. I hear Rosetta Stone is considering adding Pareseltongue to its language learning selection next year. Sign me up
9:28pm: OK, third outright lie of the live-blog. That's not too bad though.
9:29pm: Ooh the infamous Harry & Hermione naked kiss scene. Even as imaginary holograms that only Ron can see, this is kinda hot.
9:30pm: With a swing of the sword, Ron strikes a blow for jealous boyfriends everywhere. Boom, baby. Another Horcrux down.
9:31pm: Oh man, I forgot to do hair check for movie seven. This one's easy. Ron: long. Harry: short. Hermione: long and really pretty.
9:36pm: Mr. Lovegood tells the story of the three brothers and the deathly hallows. Possibly my favorite scene in the movie, since it makes sense, actually answers questions AND has a cute animation to illustrate it.
9:44pm: Another shocking surprise as Lovegood betrays the children to the Death Eaters. They escape, but only to fall right into the hands of the snatchers.
9:45pm: This always raised an interesting question to me. What the devil is a "snatcher?" Am I supposed to know? Is it British slang for something? Regardless they aren't friendly.
9:47pm: OK quick Google tells me its Voldemort's militia. Right, then. Moving on.
9:50pm: HBC and the Malfoys at home. How quaint.
9:51pm: Hey it's Luna! They're all in the same enchanted prison. Well that's fun.
9:52pm: "Dobby has come to rescue Harry Potter!" Characters that only speak in the third person are always better.
9:54pm: Stirring moment as HBC tortures Hermione pretty good, carving "Mudblood" into her forearm. One can't help but think of it as a concentration camp tattoo allegory.
9:55pm: "Stupid elf! You could have killed me!" "Dobby never meant to kill. Only to maim or perhaps seriously injure." Win.
9:57pm: HBC nails Dobby with a knife. Watching him die, even though he's a virtual creature, can't help but pull at your heart. Those big, round, dead eyes.
10:00pm: The children bury him on the beach. If I recall, it's the only actual burial we see in the series, since Dumbledore has more of a tomb. Speaking of which...
10:03pm: In one of the most dramatic movie cliffhangers in recent memory, Voldemort breaks into Dumbledore's tomb and, floating inward, takes the elder wand for himself. Big bolt of lightning in the air, and it's on to "Deathly Hallows, Part 2!"