Today is April 1, aka April Fools Day, the most headache-inducing news day of the year for Internet-based writers. There are pranks everywhere today; if you're not careful, you'll step in one, convince yourself it's a dream come true and then have your hopes dashed away by the cold, harsh light of reality and clearheaded thinking.
I was duped earlier, with the "news" that In-N-Out Burger was finally coming to New York City. I don't eat fast food anymore, but concessions would be made for In-N-Out. Alas, it was all just a sick practical joke. Whoever thought it up can burn in hell. Clever f--k.
Anyway, the movie reporting blogosphere hasn't been spared from hoaxes and hijinx either. There are quite a few running around today. I've earmarked some for closer examination, and you can find them after the jump.
UPDATE: FilmSchoolRejects Reveals Their Time Machine
This prank slipped by me, but I would be remiss in not pointing it out given how clever and well-executed it is. FilmSchoolRejects apparently slipped through a time warp today, as their dateline reads April 1, 1980. Top stories include George Lucas promising 7 more "Star Wars" flicks, a most anticipated movies of 1980 list and, in a clever bit of SEO play, a look at Ray Harryhausen's Kraken in "Clash of the Titans." A truly inspired bit of April Foolery. FilmSchoolRejects, I salute you.
"The Hobbit" Skips 3-D, Goes Directly To 4-D
What's The News: TotalFilm reports that Guillermo del Toro has decided to go ahead and shoot "The Hobbit" for 4-D presentations. For those who don't know, 4-D combines a 3-D viewing experience with physical effects, like blowing wind, misting rain, raised temperatures, etc.
Why It's Convincing: The write includes direct quotes from del Toro, based off of a call TotalFilm put in to "our mate."
Why We See Through It: Uncharacteristic quotes. Like this one: “Avatar was groundbreaking in so many ways. But now everybody is doing the exact same thing. 'Alice,' 'Clash Of The Titans'... By the time 'The Hobbit' films come out, we’ll be old news. Everybody will be sick of 3D."
"Vertigo" Re-make! In 3-D!! With George Clooney!!!
What's The News: JoBlo reports that Jason Reitman will follow up his Oscar-nominated "Up in the Air" with a remake of the Alfred Hitchcock classic "Vertigo." In 3-D. Starring George Clooney in the Jimmy Stewart role. Anne Hathaway is in talks too. They're even resurrecting Hitchcock for his expected cameo. ...okay, I made that last bit up.
Why It's Convincing: Because it would be really freaking cool if it were true? Seriously, I know Gus Van Sant's shot-for-shot "Psycho" remake was a bit of a mess. But I'd still pay money to see a Clooney-starring remake of "Vertigo" in 3-D.
Why We See Through It: Nothing specific, other than the enormity of the lie. Reitman, Clooney, Hitchcock... these are not names you just throw around. I didn't even bother putting in any calls to confirm/deny; I just chuckled and moved on to the next silly prank.
Edgar Wright Goes CG For "Ant-Man"
What's The News: Another JoBlo story. Edgar Wright, who has long been attached to an adaptation of Marvel's "Ant-Man," will collaborate with Pixar for an animated take on the comical superhero. This one's technically Splash Page territory. In fact, it's already covered in the April Fools round-up there. I'm a fan of Wright, Pixar and Ant-Man though, so I couldn't resist.
Why It's Convincing: Like the "Vertigo" rumor, it's something that could potentially be really cool.
Why We See Through It: Frankly, it could be true. It's not, but it's certainly possible. The biggest hint is probably the faked Stan Lee quote; he's uninvolved with Marvel properties these days, and I find it highly unlikely that a statement from him could have been obtained so quickly.
"Clash Of The"... Pork Rinds?
What's The News: The lovable miscreants at FilmDrunk report that Warner Bros has entered into a product placement deal for "Clash of the Titans" with Mac's Pork Skins. Friends, I have no words.
Why It's Convincing: It isn't. In the slightest. And that's what makes it so genius.
Why We See Through It: It all boils down to the ridiculous -- and amazing -- slogan that's been cooked up to celebrate and promote the new partnership: "RELEASE THE CRACKLIN'S!"
Say It Ain't So,@ThatKevinSmith!
What's The News: Twitter junkie and MTV pal Kevin Smith tweeted today: Sad to report that I'll be closing my Twitter account. It's gotten me into too much trouble. Was fun while it lasted. Bye.
Why It's Convincing: To be fair, Smith has had a rough go of things lately on the Twitter front, what with his tweetfrontation with online movie journalists and his (admittedly justified) fracas with Southwest Airlines.
Why We See Through It: As I tweeted earlier today... "@thatkevinsmith giving up on Twitter would be like Yoda giving up on the Force. Never gonna happen." Ended, this April Fools Day has.
Cinematical Bows Out
What's The News: Cinematical managing editor Scott Weinberg made a last-minute decision to forgo running an April Fools prank this year.
Why It's Convincing: This one's actually true. They think April Fools jokes are lame (correct) and that time is better spent reporting actual news (also correct).
Why We See Through It: We don't. Because it's true. So join us in signing Cinematical's anti-April Fools online petition.
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